Today I blog
I love to blog. No, really, I do. I like the challenge and discipline of putting thoughts in more or less articulate words. So why has it been a month? I just looked at the blog and saw Joey Tilton's comment about the lifelessness of this blog. Then I saw that I hadn't posted since last month. Joey's right.
I have been thinking about why this happened. It wasn't that I don't like to blog. It's not even that I don't have anything to say. At least from my perspective, there are a number of important things that have captured my attention and stirred my heart recently. It's not even that I don't think this forum is important. I do. I wish more of us would engage in the conversation. (Right now, with a few notable exceptions, it's pretty one sided.) The bottom line? It's busyness. I have had a series of things--not necessarily important things, just things--calling for my attention.
Somehow I just put it off one day at time until now I look back and I didn't write anything in March. I am frankly astounded by the sneakiness of it. If you had asked me I would have measured the time in days, maybe weeks, but not months. How did this happen? Here is an interesting thought: In February I committed to blogging ever day for 40 days. I did it. is it coincidental or expected that this dry season follows such a period of intense determination? Maybe willpower and discipline don't result in the kind of lasting change I keep hoping for.
This isn't the first time I have experiencec this. Prayer, soaking in Scripture reading, scripture memorization, prayer time with kids, engaging in evangelistic cultivating and sowing...I could keep going but you get the point. How does this happen? Better yet, how do you stop it.
Here's my solution. You're reading it. There may other dry times. I cannot promise that I will blog every day. But I will today. I have broken lots of promises--to others, to myself, to God. But I think there is something powerful that happens when I realize it and start again. How did Paul put it? "Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead." So today I blog. Will it change the world? Who knows for sure. I think probably not in any recognizable way. Nevertheless, today I blog.
posted by Tod Brown at 9:20 AM
3 Comments:
Glad to have you back. Blog away!
April 4, 2005 at 10:04 PM
(Tod, I was not trying to be critical - just hoping it would get going again.)
There are times when I flat out do not want to do what I know is right (and am convinced that I am the only one who does this). And while I am in such a state, I still believe that there is (a) God, and that He is watching me; and it occurs to me that I am my own worst enemy; and I wish that David had written more psalms saying, "Lord, save me from myself," because I want to know that I am not the only one who goes through this, and that God will save me from me. I want to believe that if David had died before Nathan got to him that God would have shown him mercy. But we aren't specifically told this, and, besides, David was, well, David - God's special man - of course He's going to forgive David; but I am just me, and don't deserve.....Okay, I guess what I am saying is that, Tod, you are forgiven for the brief break in the Brown blog (note the artistic use of alliteration).
April 4, 2005 at 10:56 PM
Hey guys,
I'm intruding on your blog. It's a slow day here at the clinic, so I thought I'd add my little piece to the discussion.
I was at a men's retreat at my church this weekend. A guy named Randy Boyd reminded us that we have been promised the blessings of Abraham. We have inherited the new covenant, so we get to go beyond what Abraham was promised right into the throne romm of the Almighty, Loving, Perfect, Holy God of the universe.
Abraham, in just 4 generations went from being one man- the son of an idol worshipper- to being a clan. Not just a clan, but his great-grandson Joseph was the most powerful man in the world. Why? Because he was good? No. Because he was born into it? No. He was chosen by God. There is no other explanation for it. Read Romans if you doubt it. Esau was stronger and more loved than Jacob, but Isaac gave Jacob the blessing because God had chosen Jacob.
So, here's the point (for Joey and anyone else who's reading). You were chosen by God to be blessed. He made you His child. He doesn't choose most people, but He chose you. Dwell on that for a long, long time. Then believe God. He is Good. He loves you. And He owns the whole universe.
I often find myself slipping into the "just enough" mentality. I think God has just enough to meet my needs for today. That's not the truth! The Canaanite woman had it right when she told Jesus that the crumbs from His table were enough to satisfy her. He owns everything. He wants to give us all we can hold. He is not stingy. He is not holding back on us. As Psalm 81 says, "Open wide your mouth and I will fill it."
Instead of bucking it up for another day and striving to please Him by our own will power, let's just look to Him, marvel at His grace, and open our hands wide to receive His blessing. He will rain down His abundance on us in immeasurable ways.
I realized even as I was hearing this message that it is a dangerous one. Immediately I begin to envision televangelists with fancy cars and Rolex watches. John Piper said on his radio broadcast yesterday that every teaching in the Bible is dangerous. It is the most dangerous book in the world. There are precarious cliffs all around, and if we stray in any direction we will likely fall into heresy. So even if a teaching is dangerous, we cannot reject God's truth. God clearly promises abundant, bountiful, overflowing blessings to those who follow Him. Mark 10 says that there will be blessings in this life, and in the age to come.
Therefore, I don't have to be afraid of God's abundance. I long for it. I ask for it. I wait expectantly for it.
I am deeply afraid of my own sinful greedy heart. So I keep my hands open. When I sense my fingers beginning to curl up into a fist around one of God's blessings He leads me, like Abraham, to the altar of sacrifice where I give it away. Sometimes, like Isaac, God tells me to keep the gift. Other times He takes if from me, but always, always, always He replaces it with something more precious and joy-producing than what I gave to Him. It is definitely true that the most joy-producing blessings He gives in this life are in relationships- to Him and to others. In my life I have found that material blessings bring me a measure of joy, but it's like when I got free tickets to a Dallas Cowboys game. I enjoyed the game, but I will never go back because I had to fight the devil throughout the game to keep my eyes on the field or on my wife beside me and not on the cheerleaders. (That really happened.) The material things God gives are not bad or inherently evil (like the football game wasn't evil). It's just that I find myself having to fight harder to manage them.
You will probably be thankful to know that I have a patient ready now, so I'll stop here.
God is good. God loves His children. God loves to bless His kids with all that He can bless them with. So let's keep our hands open, and our minds thinking correctly about the joyful, generous God that we serve.
Maybe someday I'll blog about why all that makes me want to sell everything I have and give it to the poor.
In the joy and peace of Jesus,
Randy Brown
April 7, 2005 at 7:47 AM
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